Depression Dad Jokes Edition

To the jerk that stole my antidepressants…

“I hope you’re happy now.”

Saw a nut job on the street wearing fake beard,

and I thought “dis guise crazy”.

I got pulled over by a female cop.

When I rolled down the window and asked what’s wrong, she said “NOTHING”.

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Dad Jokes: 7/31/18

Dad Jokes: 7/31/18

Everyone in my family was a police officer, except for my grandad, who was a bank robber.
He died last week surrounded by his family.

I just asked Siri :
“Surely it’s not going to rain today?”
She said “it will, and don’t call me Shirley”
…Forgot to take my phone off Airplane mode.

The firefighters in Greece are making the fire worse…
You aren’t supposed to use water on Greece fires.

I can think of two good reasons to wear diapers
Number one and number two.

 

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